deep

 I had been up since 5 a.m. The light of morning finding me ridiculously, standing in the yard in running shorts, big orange boots, a tank top, and BC's jacket.  Sweat left over from a kickboxing lesson (I barely survived) hanging on me like ocean fog.  The lining of BC's coat sticking to my bare skin.  But BC nowhere to be found.

The frost is deceiving, it is not cold.  The hardest part of the day already behind me: I got out of bed. I kicked imaginary attackers.  I kicked them hard.  All that is left to do is take on the real ones.

 'Dig deeper' the voices say

'Where?" I ask sighing, sitting in a field of of half dug holes.

'Find the spot you have already begun to claim and dig deeper.'

'But how?' I ask again, tired and alone.

'Fight' they say.

'I thought I was fighting' I whine.

'Stand up and dig deeper....'